I have a crush!

Now I know this isn't late breaking important news, but, ehem, I have a bona fide crush! I've been denying it for a while but I thought, maybe if I just say it, somewhere, to someone, I'll stop thinking about it so much.

I've wondered why I even have a crush on this guy? I met him while I was still dating my ex-bf while at a party of sorts. I had drank quite a bit so I don't remember much of our conversations but I do remember him saying that right now he wants someone he can "settle down with." Maybe that's what's got me.. but then again, he's in his early 20s, so its just his hormones talking. Secondly, I'm not so much in the settling down mood anyway. So what is it really? He's really cute, fun-loving, and perceptive in strange ways. The negative? He's like a kid. We're practically the same age, but the belief that women are much more mature than men their age proves to be quite true in this situation. Though I think that part of my "crush" on this guy is fueled by the fact that I made my relationship w/ my ex so serious AND my ex is older than me. So now I think I just want to experience the flip side.

Problem is, I'm never good with crushes. The only crush I actually dated was my ex and that situation was very different than this one. My ex and I lived together and so it was easy to play the game and keep him *thinking of me* which is huge when trying to rope someone in. In this case though, we only have one mutual acquaintance who I don't talk to or hang out w/ much. Plus! There's always the issue of "competition." Most of the time, I figure girls are so bad when it comes to dating guys - overly clingy, try to rope them in w/ sex, etc. - that I stand a good chance to "win" the guy over. Problem is that with younger guys, hormones rule and thus, all the "competition" really has to do is be nice and be willing to sleep with the guy. Unless of course he is truly holding out for true relationship material.

But then again, I'm not ready for a relationship right now. But I also don't want to get involved in anything casual! So once again I'm paralyzed by my reluctance to move forward... which I guess is a good thing anyway.

The other issue is that I've ran into this guy twice after our first meeting. I know he thinks I'm attractive - he's said so - and thinks I'm "cool" - he's said so - but he's never made a move; no "hey we should hang out" on his end.

Hmph. What a state of affairs. A crush I sorta want to date but not right now...