New Dating Rule: Date someone who is where you want to be

I had a Eu-fuckin-reka moment today.

I have this friend. My intent in this post is not to bad mouth my friend or put her down or anything, so if it comes off as such, it's just b/c I'm not very eloquent.

So anyway, I have this friend. She was dating a guy at my medical school, but they broke up and now she's dating another guy at my medical school. Not a very interesting story at first, but it becomes more interesting when I think of her dating pattern. To be honest, the reason I began thinking about her dating history was when I pointed her out to an acquaintance while at a party and told him that she was one of very few attractive medical students. Within 5 seconds yet another medical student was hitting on her. Later on this acquaintance mentioned that he thought she and I were both attractive but wondered why she got hit on all the time. He didn't go as far as to ask if I did, and if not, why not.. but that alone made me wonder. I mean it makes sense, she's pretty, she's amicable, she's very feminine - which for guys who lack a lot of masculinity is a great draw... but then my mind started to wander until I realized something about her dating pattern..

As an undergrad she was dating a guy who wanted to to get a masters from a competitive program that accepted very few candidates. They eventually broke up, but both of them got into the program. Then she started dating another guy (days after her break up with the first guy). This new guy wanted to get into med school at his alma mater, which would be a difficult task given that the med school doesn't like taking its "own" students. Lo and behold he got in. Two years later, guess who else gets in? My friend! Now she's dating a guy who has won a prestigious award. Something tells me that in the not too far future, she may be a winner of this prestigious award too. And you know what, it makes sense.

When you date someone who is doing something you want to do, you have an intimate view into the process. More than that, you have a leg up in many ways. B/c she dated a guy who was going to the medical school she wanted to gain acceptance to, she was introduced to a lot of activities on the med school campus and got involved as the head-bitch-in-charge of one activity which has led her to a really cool research project working w/ heads of the medical school, as a first year student!

The thing is, I don't think she does it on purpose. She's very genuine so I don't think she goes after guys to "learn secrets" and then move on. It makes me wonder though.. its as if destiny has put certain people in her path so that she can reach the next milestone..

It made me wonder then, does the same thing happen w/ me? Well, not really. Instead it seems like the people I date eventually end up at a better place. Though my sample size is a whopping 2 in both of these examples, my first "ex-boyfriend" wanted to be a comedian but struggled to do weekly gigs at random bars. Now? He won a national competition and will be on comedy central. Although that probably had very little to do w/ me seeing that I have no idea what it takes to be a successful comedian.. My current/last (yes we're in limbo right now) boyfriend really really wanted to go to my alma mater. Now? Two years later, he's here.

The only thing I can piece together from all these seemingly "coincidental" dating histories is that one should date someone who is where they want to be. It's the best way to get advice and to see how success is achieved! Now, I hope that you can also get to the same place by being *friends* with someone who is where you want to be.. but that might be a little more tricky.

So I guess that means I should keep an eye out for any Rhodes, Fulbright, Marshall scholars, anyone who does international health research, or anyone who has started a successful start-up. Haha, my goals are all over the place, but maybe it will be in destiny's plans to present me with a friend who can help me get ahead!