New American Dream

I was talking to my mother the other day about the possibility of selling our (as if i helped buy it.. i mean her) house and making a relocation.. it's been a long time coming. She told me about the prices of houses in every city and how the seller's market is just getting out of hand. She explained how the sellers market is working these days. People that have been living in their homes for about 10-20 years have either paid up their mortgage or are mostly done paying. After such an investment no one is willing to sell their house for less than they bought it for and due to changing economy etc., are more likely to sell the house at a much higher price than they bought it for. The only people selling at reasonable prices are those who bought a house, lived there for only 5 years or less and must relocate for some reason. This is very simplistic I know..

I thought to myself wow, with the increase in housing prices, has the American dream changed? Decades before our time it was all about the image of the immigrant rising up through hard work and education to make enough money to live comfortably. Or the regular joe and jane shmoe family where a couple bought a house, a car, and had a perfect family enclosed within a white picket fence. My mother joked that today, an immigrant couldn't even buy space in a kitchen, much less a house. So what is the fate of our generation - those who won't be settling down and having kids for another 5-10 years? Again, my mother interjects: "Honey, the American Dream has changed." Now the American Dream is about finding that good job (should be read high paying job) that allows you to live comfortably.. the job comes first. And with many more people getting college degrees, you might as well use your diploma to wipe your ass when you run out of toilet paper. More than that, when it comes to family, as my mom describes the situation, women have much more bargaining power. Also recieving higher education at a higher rate, women are now at a level where they can look at a man and say "what is your earning potential AND your IQ?" If its not up to par and we can't work together to own a home, keep on moving. Moreover, the power gained by women has put more pressure on men to find a way to be the best providers they can be.

As I continued the conversation I almost became dizzy. What a different world we're living in. Just as we learned about the culture our parents grew up in while in grade school, our kids will learn of what our generation struggled through and the accomplishments we extolled as our ideals.. and it looks like, on the surface at least, its going to be a lot different from what we learned about American ideals of generations before. I mean the basics are still there, work hard now for the big pay off later... but the pay off we all want seems to be much bigger than many before us could have imagined. Not only that, but the work needed to get to the pay off has increased as well.

It really makes you wonder though. Adolescent psychologists commonly speak of the extention of adolescence to one's early 20's these days since so many more people are going to college and depend on their parents for a longer amount of time. Subsequently, people are marrying later and later.. This does not seem to match up well with our biologies. Our biological clocks say "Have babies earlier women or take the chance of having a fucked up kid come from crusty fucked up eggs.." Then again, you can always freeze your eggs when you're young so you can have them when you're ready to have kids later!

Well I guess that's what science is for.. to keep human biology in step with changes in culture and society... Interesting.. But I digress..

The changing american dream.. my mother's advice? Work damn hard so you can be in a social circle of people who have the same qualifications as you do and make sure you marry the best of the best. If you think you're not with the best of the best, drop them immediatly as they are only keeping you from your goal. And even if you do find the best you can do, be prepared to be living in a one room hell hole for a while until some bank approves you for a loan you'll be paying until you die.

Happy living! :)