A Crazy Little Thing Called Love/Life

I've given up on trying to understand certain things about men. For instance, why they think [insert name of huge chested girl here] is so great when she has nothing else going for her but big boobs.

But when it comes down to it, guys are quite predictable. For that matter since woman are also under the influence of culture and biology women can be predictable too. But my post isnt about women :) . I'm not trying to bash men either. I don't hate men, how could I, I have a friend who's a man! Well more than one.. anyway. My whole quest to understand, simplify, and apply my knowledge about men I guess comes from a good place. If you don't understand something its easy to become frustrated, bitter and/or unreceptive. I'm attempting not to take that pitfall.

Last weekend gave me another piece of knowledge about the male psyche. After having extended conversations with a few recent stanford grads, I found one running theme. The guys that I talked to had been hopeless romantics since they stepped foot on campus. They were going to find her and she was going to be the love of their lives, and they would live happily ever after in their million dollar mansions. Regardless of the path they took during their stanford careers (always in a relationship, always single, etc) many of them arrived at the same place. After graduation they got great jobs at great companies with great salaries, and all of a sudden, she disappeared, whether she was always an image, or somehow happened to materialize during their college careers. Now, they have free time and money with no real obligation as to where or how to spend either. More than that, society is no longer telling men that they need to settle down immediatly. All of a sudden the quest to have a "good time" becomes of utmost importance. Almost overnight, the main goal is to "play the field," "see what's out there." No need to settle down when you're a graduate of a prestigious institution making good money in a culture where many women would do anything for a guy who had such qualifications. Oh and if he knows he has options? He's practically a wild man on the loose at that point.

Now any woman who gets involved with any of these guys at this point in their lives is sure to get hurt. B/c a majority of the time when a guy like this enters a relationship, while he might be excited at first, he'll eventually start to think his way out of the relationship.. no matter how great the girl is (I've been told this many times - oh and not by people I was ever romantically involved with.)

Now if I were able to build a time machine and talk to these guys when they start entering their mid to late 20's I am absolutely sure that they will have a complete 180 degree turn in outlook. Eventually they start to find that the women they meet aren't very interesting, intelligent, well-rounded, etc. Spending money on copious amounts of drugs and alcohol every weekend doesn't seem to make sense anymore. Whatever it is, their outlook on life will just change. Just like that! With little to no warning. Beyond societal pressure to settle the hell down, its also biological - woman have a biological clock and so do men.. no one said they were synchronized.

So what does it all boil down to again? Timing. And I'll retract a statement I made in an earlier post that intimated that once a guy is ready to get married "any girl will do." I think a lot of people have this misconception because it happens so quickly. He dumped one girlfriend and he's marrying another six months later for instance. I think its more that when a guy is ready to marry, he's ready to see the qualities in a woman that make her wife material and is quick to dismiss any woman he meets who doesn't measure up. Thus, they start to only date potential "ones" until it finally works out.

So yeah. In the end, I don't know what the actual purpose of this post was, since I'm not saying anything profound. But I guess its one of those infamous south park moments where, "I learned something today." Most young guys are out to have fun.. its the first time they have physical and financial freedom in their lives. And the good ones don't have premeditated game plans of how they're going to use you and dump you. It's just the way of the world for many people. The best thing to do? Think positive and only date the good ones.

:-) G'night