Some more motherly advice

My mom has been dropping advice bombs on me lately, so I thought I'd share, and also write them down somewhere so I wouldn't forget.

1.) Me: "Yeah I have friends who talk to their boyfriend's everyday, and it makes me wonder, what the hell are they talking about?" Mom: "Tell your girlfriend's to stop that nonsense. Talking on the phone everyday and wonder why you get dumped. When you blab your mouth so often you start revealing your secrets. You're just saying things, meanwhile he's recording the details he doesnt like, which he will use later when he leaves. Most people probably talk about their mothers or fathers. WHO CARES? Keep it light! Talk about current events, books, something you did that day, then say good night! But no, instead you're talking about your family members and how this one did that, and he's thinking "oh, her family is more f*ed up than mine." Oh and the lovey dovey stuff.. as if you're married. Don't do that either."

2.) Mom: "See this is a mistake a lot of women make. They go into the kitchen and cook up these full course meals for their husbands and present it, 'here you go honey,' not knowing that you're just giving that man the strength to cheat. He eats that food you just prepared then calls his 'friend' to meet up later. But if you don't cook, then he gets back home and you say 'where do you want to go to eat?' It takes at least a couple of hourse to drive to the place, order, eat, chat. By the time he gets home he's too tired to go looking for someone else. He just has sex w/ you and goes to bed."

3.) Me: "You know, I'm just not the type to go seek out a person for marriage just because of their race. I'm going to be working crazy hours, probably won't get out much, might be introduced to people through friends, and hey, if it's not a black guy, so be it."
Mom: "Honey, it doesn't matter if you stay locked up in your house, your soul mate will come knocking. It doesn't matter if you are in a plane and it crashes in your soul mate's living room and you and he are the only survivors. You'll meet him and just know. When soul mates meet each other they just keep going together, even if the rest of the world is like, what in the world?? Why are they together? Haven't you ever seen people fall in love who don't even speak the same language?"
Me: "Yeah! When I was shadowing at the hospital there was this couple with a kid and the husband didn't even speak English!"
Mom: "Ooh, ok. See what I mean?"
Me: "First of all, I never knew you believed in soul mates, secondly, can soul mates get divorced? I mean I'm just thinking of all the people who get married and are like, 'oh you are my soul mate.' Then 10 years later they're like 'fuck you! I want a divorce.'"
Mom: "Firstly, a lot of people don't marry their soul mates. They marry for superficial reasons like, oh he makes this amount of money, has this status, yup! I'll marry him. But secondly, when ego is involved, yes soul mates can divorce. When neither party has ego, then nothing is stoping them, they'll be together forever."

More to be added...