Why relationships crash and burn

So remember that post earlier I had about being a bitch and staying one forever, no matter what the guy does?

Yeah.. see.. stuff like that is always much easier said and thought when you are not in a relationship. But once it comes time to practice the "bitch skills" the best laid plans.. well you know.. go down the crapper.

Yesterday when talking to the bf (i think) he asked if I wanted to join him in the city for a date later in the week. At first I was appauled by the idea of having to drive to see him and told him I'd "think about it." He seemed a tad testy and said he wasn't expecting an answer right then and there.. right ok.

Well I thought about it and realized that my reaction was due to remembering various "rules" that say that a man should travel to see you most of the time and not the other way around. But for some reason, all of a sudden this rule seemed ridiculous. He has work earlier than I have to be at class during the weekday. So if we worked out a compromise - I visit during the week, he visits during the weekend - it seems that neither of us would feel like things were one sided. Ok, so I decided it wasn't horrible to go see him. But now the question is do I call him now or tomorrow?

When people make plans w/ me I want updates on the status of the plans like a weather report - if there are any changes I want a 5 day forecast (i.e. don't call me 5 minutes before to say yay or nay, i want to know way ahead of time). So there is the rule - treat others like you want to be treated. But in my experience I think I'm a tad more neurotic then others so other people don't need to be updated so much in advance. But the day before isn't *too* much in advance. But at the same time, I'd keep him guessing by waiting until tomorrow.

Hmm..

I've finally decided - If he needs to know much earlier than tomorrow he'll call and ask. Otherwise.. I'll let him know tomorrow.

But I can already see that the walls that I'm supposed to be holding up indefinetly will crumble at some point. And then if there is yet another break up I'll tell myself "SEE! I should have just been a bitch!" Well, I have a theory. I think for most people the ability to be a bitch takes on a U-shaped curve - its easy to be a bitch in the beginning but once you start to get those horomones pumping through your veins, you drop the shield, but then when the horomones are gone and you know the person really well, your bitchiness rises... just a theory. Since a lot of people break up before the bitch shield rebounds I guess it'll be a hard thing to test...