AWK-ward

Um so it dawned on me that my bf has seen me at my WORST. And I've started to wonder if I should be alarmed by this. This thought came after recalling the events of July 4th. I went rafting with him and some of his friends and instead of buying beer as he suggested, I told him I didn't want to drink any stinkin beer and that I was going to drink vodka cranberries instead. Truth is, I would have gotten beer IF it were not for the fact that I was in the car when his ex-gf called to wish him a happy 4th of July. I don't know why I was so annoyed, but hey, at least I didn't turn psycho on him. Instead I inflicted the pain on myself.

Despite his warnings I drank half a huge gatorade bottle of vodka - we weren't allowed to bring in glass bottles so we had to be resourceful - while the bf's friend drank the other half. During the last leg of the trip down the river I was so drunk I kept falling out of my boat.. well ok just twice. And also decided that I wanted to puke - which I accomplished by sticking my finger down my throat and yacking into the river... hot!

Then I fell asleep w/ my mouth open. I knew I fell asleep w/ my mouth open b/c when I woke up I turned around without closing my mouth and puked once again.. into the river. Once we hit shore.. more puking ensued. Somehow, either b/c he saw me as pathetic or b/c he just wanted to help, the bf hugged me and made me chug water and told me not to feel so bad that I can't handle my alcohol since he's older and still can't handle his either...

So lets see if I'm keeping the correct tally, in the time I've known him I've
- Puked in his bathroom toilet while he watched
- Puked on him in a cab
- Puked into a river in front of him multiple times

I also realize that he's probably seen me at my best as well. While I was living with him I had to get dolled up for promotional stuff on many occassions.

So maybe it all balances out - the good, the bad, the ugly. Maybe...