Are you guys serious???
Oh, no, sorry, I wasn't asking you.
As the holidays or as I call them "Guilt Free No Study Days" approach, people want to know what you'll be doing and where you plan to be. Well seeing that people know that I'm from NY and I'm yet to get my ass on the plane a few friends and acquaintances have asked, "What are you hanging around here for?" Then I respond, "Oh I'm going to Sac-town for Thanksgiving." Then comes the puzzled face, "What's in Sacramento?" My response - "The boyfriend's family" Then the - "Oooh, you guys are that serious?" I usually want to laugh at this point, but instead I wonder how quickly I can sum up the fact that going to his parents' house doesn't make the relationship "serious." Whatever that means anyway. I went to his parents' house last year as his roommate - no we weren't dating then - and so I'm going this year again.. "As what?" I don't know.. maybe the gf.. no I haven't asked him if he's told them. I assume he has seeing that he drops his dog off there all the time to head down here.. but who knows. I'll just pretend I'm the ex-roommate, and hope for the best. "Why pretend?" I'm asked. Weeell.. it all goes back to the first time I met his family and his brother made the comment "Yeah, our dad hates the girls we bring home. We don't say anything. But then he eventually figures out we're dating them and then hates them." My old roommate, drunk, blurted out, "Well your dad looves us!" And I (more soberly) pointed out, "well yeah, probably because we're most definetly roommates, and not girlfriends."
Um yeah. His dad loved me and the old roommate.. as "roommates" and so now I fear looking across the table and having the bf's dad stare at me as he's cutting turkey, size me up, and wonder how he can destroy me. I'm not too intimidated by most people, but his dad is a pretty intimidating figure. The kind that doesn't have to say a word before making you feel somewhat inadequate.
And what does "serious" mean anyway? Like marriage track? That's a negative. At 22, whoops excuse me, TWENTY-THREE, I'm still in La-La land when it comes to thinking seriously. As for the bf.. for all I know he's still on his "get married at 40" track.. again I don't ask. Although having him around makes day dreaming about my wedding day a lot easier. It's not something I spend much time thinking about, but for some reason I've been thinking about it more lately. Maybe I've been around a lot more friends who are married or on their way to becoming hitched. So now, instead of having a myopic view of just myself in my BEAUTIFUL VW dress, I can zoom out and mix and match shirt, tie, and tux colors for the groom. Or should [insert name here] not wear a tie? Thats the extent to my thoughts on marriage. So clearly, its not serious.
I've had this conversation at least 5 times, 2 of which were in large groups, which made the convo even more awkward.. I guess I could have just taken the easy way out - "Oh are you guys serious?" Me - "Yes." The end. The added bonus would be if/when we broke up people would feel especially bad for me, and maybe even bake me cookies... maybe.
As the holidays or as I call them "Guilt Free No Study Days" approach, people want to know what you'll be doing and where you plan to be. Well seeing that people know that I'm from NY and I'm yet to get my ass on the plane a few friends and acquaintances have asked, "What are you hanging around here for?" Then I respond, "Oh I'm going to Sac-town for Thanksgiving." Then comes the puzzled face, "What's in Sacramento?" My response - "The boyfriend's family" Then the - "Oooh, you guys are that serious?" I usually want to laugh at this point, but instead I wonder how quickly I can sum up the fact that going to his parents' house doesn't make the relationship "serious." Whatever that means anyway. I went to his parents' house last year as his roommate - no we weren't dating then - and so I'm going this year again.. "As what?" I don't know.. maybe the gf.. no I haven't asked him if he's told them. I assume he has seeing that he drops his dog off there all the time to head down here.. but who knows. I'll just pretend I'm the ex-roommate, and hope for the best. "Why pretend?" I'm asked. Weeell.. it all goes back to the first time I met his family and his brother made the comment "Yeah, our dad hates the girls we bring home. We don't say anything. But then he eventually figures out we're dating them and then hates them." My old roommate, drunk, blurted out, "Well your dad looves us!" And I (more soberly) pointed out, "well yeah, probably because we're most definetly roommates, and not girlfriends."
Um yeah. His dad loved me and the old roommate.. as "roommates" and so now I fear looking across the table and having the bf's dad stare at me as he's cutting turkey, size me up, and wonder how he can destroy me. I'm not too intimidated by most people, but his dad is a pretty intimidating figure. The kind that doesn't have to say a word before making you feel somewhat inadequate.
And what does "serious" mean anyway? Like marriage track? That's a negative. At 22, whoops excuse me, TWENTY-THREE, I'm still in La-La land when it comes to thinking seriously. As for the bf.. for all I know he's still on his "get married at 40" track.. again I don't ask. Although having him around makes day dreaming about my wedding day a lot easier. It's not something I spend much time thinking about, but for some reason I've been thinking about it more lately. Maybe I've been around a lot more friends who are married or on their way to becoming hitched. So now, instead of having a myopic view of just myself in my BEAUTIFUL VW dress, I can zoom out and mix and match shirt, tie, and tux colors for the groom. Or should [insert name here] not wear a tie? Thats the extent to my thoughts on marriage. So clearly, its not serious.
I've had this conversation at least 5 times, 2 of which were in large groups, which made the convo even more awkward.. I guess I could have just taken the easy way out - "Oh are you guys serious?" Me - "Yes." The end. The added bonus would be if/when we broke up people would feel especially bad for me, and maybe even bake me cookies... maybe.
posted by GyangBang | 9:25 PM
1 Comments:
Wonder what would happen if people found out that my ex-roomie and I were serious? :-D Kidding!!!
I think you should bring your own turkey cutting knife to dinner so you can defend yourself (should the need arise). What's so intimidating? How many degrees from Stanford does his dad have? Medical degrees? And I bet his dad doesn't have a knock-out figure like you do. :-D You know, before I went to Cali, I would have been horribly nervous to be around the prestigious populace out there. But after years of interacting with them, I've come to realize that people have more skeletons in the closet than they have great magnificent accolades on the wall. And even if that weren't true, anyone who enjoys making other people feel bad about themselves doesn't deserve respect anyway! Be yourself - whether you're his future daughter-in-law or not - and he'd be a fool to not like you.
You should hang out with me more often - I'll get your mind off marriage right away! I'm on the "get married at 102" track. :-p
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