I'm Angry

After deciding that, yes, Mr. Protege is a shady character I really need not have in my life, in my boredom and procrastination I went online looking for an article about signs that a guy is married, or has a girlfriend, etc., to see if I had a right to be suspicious. I found that I did. But I also randomly came across a forum about women talking about compulsive liars who were either boyfriends, husbands, fathers of their children etc. I read through some of it to humor myself, but to my suprise I just became completely angered. I'm angered by the stupidity of the women, the narrow mindedness, and the complete inability to live life!

I swear stories ranged from "My boyfriend is a compulsive liar and lies about stupid stuff to make himself feel better" to "I have been married for 13 years and my husband has been lying to me from day one. It started off with small lies, but now its big lies and our house is being repossessed." And what did all of these women have in common? After going on about the clear pattern a compulsive liar has - the lies always started out small and got bigger with time - the dumbasses had the nerve to say that they still loved the men that lied to them, caused them pain, ruined their lives, made friends and families abandon them, and were looking for ways to help the LIARS!

Man! What a trip. One post went so far as to say, "you should try to help a compulsive liar, unless he's cheating on you. No one should put up with cheating!" How comical! Cheating.. no. But years of deciept, emotional abuse, and losing yourself is A-OK!

How sad.. I'm coming to learn now that a person's world is as large or small as they want it to be. If you believe that you've met someone and although they're bad for you, you guys are meant to be together, then you've resigned to a life of smallness, closing yourself off from the world OUT THERE. On the other hand, people who see the world to be a much more expansive place with lessons to be learned, people to meet, and adventures to be embarked upon, would never let themselves put up with so much bullshit. I mean yes, we all falter and get trapped in small world thinking - we're only human. But there comes a point - actually there should be many points - in one's life where one has to take stock of where one is and where one wants to go in life.

Does it really matter that so and so said such and such about you? Do you really want to spend the rest of your life with someone you feel blah about? Do you really deserve any abuse, emotional and otherwise? The answer should be a resounding NO! I'm not going to lie and say that the world outside of the ones we tend to create for ourselves is completely awesome. That's why we choose to stay in our bubbles in the first place right? At least I know whats going on right now, right here. Why risk it and find out that things are worse outside of my bubble?

Well, that's just not living. Some of the strongest lessons we learn in life come from venturing out, making a mistake, and remembering never to make that mistake again. And in the dissappointment that can come from exploration there is also excitement and joy that can come from discovering things you may not have even been looking for in the first place.

But geezum people, have we all really gotten to the point where we'd rather sacrifice happiness and sense of self just so that we can be "safe" with what we have sitting at home? And why are so many humans masochists? Its almost as if we instinctively go out looking to create trouble and disorder in our lives with people who are bad for us, rather than exploring and learning how to make ourselves better people.

Anyway, I'm going to get off my soap box now and hope that at least one person reading this will understand what the hell I'm rambling on about..

In essence, don't sell yourself short kido. Your life can be as good as you want it to be*...
(sans external forces like tsunamis and crazy family members.. but who said life was easy?)